been here for a week now. last night i was phenomenally restless: i couldn't sleep, then when i did, i had some ridiculous dreams. at one point i was in the mafia, and was attempting to take over an ice cream shop. matt (who's sleep was somewhat disturbed by the enthusiastic nibblings of kramer) and i went downtown this morning and failed to meet jacob. best laid plans. being a tour guide is not my forté by any stretch of the imagination, but i did my best to entertain.
we walked from osgoode station at queen and university west along queen st, then worked our way south to the harbour (with a quick stop at tim hortons along the way), passing right by the cn tower. it's still as big as last week.
with the tower behind us, we walked northish. it's been ridiculously warm here today, clear and bright. it's still above zero at 11 pm. i want the cold back.
we worked our way up to nathan philips square. it's strange being in a city so new; buildings built a hundred years ago are few and far between.
heading back home, we were met by ruth and pete (mark's folks), james (best man) and toby (bass player extraordinaire), who had all flown in together from manchester. much chaos ensued.
mark announced he wanted an early night, but was going out with bethany and we were to fend for ourselves. i cooked something, james cleared up, toby and matt fell asleep. mark is mia, presumed dead.
i feel torn. i am settled, at home with my best friend, in a new place that has welcomed me more quickly than i could imagine. there are people around who i love and in who's company i can thrive. yet it feels like the end. mark is soon to be gone, he will become markandbethany. even the arrival of more people today has diluted what we have had for the last week. i miss leeds. more now than ever. i want to be back in the community that i once called home, that i turned my back on. i want i want i want me me me...
j arrives in 3 days. this is a good thing.
mark's home. he's not dead.
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